Sinking in the Backyard

That sucks. Especially if you don't have your cell phone on your lap. Then you're f***ing stuck, sinking. Every time you try and move a little bit more, you sink more.

You gotta wait and get help. Somebody's gotta come and get you.

There's no wheelchair place to call and say, hey, I'm stuck, I need a wheelchair tow.

Right? That'd be a great service, actually.

I think they do. It's that, "Help, I'm falling and I can't get up."

But you still gotta have the f***ing button with ya, so.

And chairs in Florida need fat tires.